Shame and stigma can permeate every aspect of our lives and make pleasure, love and work challenging, painful and sometimes impossible. Shame and stigma often mask something special and remarkable about a person; talents, identities, ways of living or loving that are unappreciated, misunderstood and even repudiated. Deviance and difference should not be requisites for pain and failure; those qualities can be empowering and liberating. Often, it is a dominant culture that pulls the veil of shame over our eyes and hearts. Our stories and ourselves are worthy of dignity and care, regardless of what we learn from the dominant discourse.
My background as a person who has lived with stigma and experienced minority stress allows me to see the world differently and often unmasked. My life experiences as a person who has thrived in subculture and fringe communities has helped me to appreciate the myriad of possibilites we have, all the ways we can change our minds, trust our intuition and lean into creativity. My life experiences have helped me to become more compassionate, creative and open minded. I hope to help you see how your differences can be your strengths, and the parts of you that no one sees are worthy of care. My job is to help you to understand and appreciate yourself better, so you can start having the kinds of experiences and relationships that excite and fulfill you.
I primarily work with individuals on self acceptance, improving their relationships and in helping them explore their sexual identities in ways that are safe, sustainable and consensual. My client focus is typically those who are anywhere from curious to passionate about BDSM, kink and fetishism. My work as a relationship and individual therapist is affirming of all gender, consensually sexual and romantic presentations and identities; I am sex worker allied and have extensive experience in the adult industry. I am trained in EMDR, I also have sex therapy training and supervision and I practice from a harm reductive lens with a focus on relational-cultural theory.
It is my belief that personal autonomy and agency, combined with consent, are all a person needs in order to live and love meaningfully and healthily. That being said, sometimes we need a little extra help in understanding what those pieces mean, or we may need assistance. My goal is to help you to be as safe as possible, without intervening with your values and the ways that you choose to live and love.